Releasing the little person within.

“Look deep into nature and you will understand everything better”. Albert Einstein

Hello and welcome…let’s share another cuppa together this week πŸ¦‹

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Well, Autumn lends itself to much contemplation for me…

I had the opportunity of sitting in a beautiful country village nestled in the mountains, watching the golden or red leaves gently float towards the ground. As they released themselves from the tree, some would not make it all the way, but would become wedged on a branch… it was if it were not quite ready to complete its journey yet, but still hung on to the tree, as if for comfort, as if for fear of fully surrendering to its transformation.

I also wondered…
Does the tree decide it’s time to release something that doesn’t serve it any longer?
What is it about that particular instant when the leaf begins to retreat?

Or…
Do the leaves decide it’s their time to fall away from the tree…
Relinquishing to something that’s been its support and nourishment for so long?

After my last three huge posts, things were presented as if I had made great progress in accepting myself and moving forward, finally content in the knowledge that I am comfortable in my own skin…

That’s all very well to believe, until something seemingly benign pushed that big red button on my back…
It’s usually a passing comment said by someone who doesn’t know our sensitivity to that particular topic… how could they really, if we have tried to hide it or disown it…
And in the freedom of being myself, I am learning that I must also afford others the same benefit to say what they need to, remembering we are all at different stages of this journey of evolution.

Until that moment, I’d thought…’I’ve got this now! You go girl! You’ve learnt much and worked hard on yourself…’

It was a welcome gift in retrospect.

These are my beautiful new awakenings from moments like this….

🌹 You see, it enabled me to discover those things that still push my ‘big red button’, that were next in line to be healed.
🌹It taught me that there is still a little more work to be done in my acceptance of those things I was ashamed of… that there is some more love to be generated towards myself.
🌹I understood that everything and everyone is here to help me evolve, no matter how much discomfort is stirred within.
🌹That it’s ok to be stirred by something. Evolution isn’t a static thing but like a mountain where each step takes you to the top, building on each other to get you closer to where you’re headed.
🌹It taught me there are some well worn beliefs that also must become like the leaves from the tree…they have served their purpose, but for growth to occur, they need to be discarded.

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So what did I do to comfort myself when I was triggered?

✨Firstly, I sat with my feelings of sadness and disappointment. It was what it was, and denying it would only keep my truth even further from me.
✨I searched deeply to work out why it hurt so much.
✨I spent some more time alone in nature, where I feel she accepts me as I am.
✨I discovered I treated myself gently during times like this… I’d walk slower, drive slower ( oh dear! Those people behind me, I’m sorry!) It was like I was cradling myself towards healing.
✨I decided that progress had occurred, in that I wasn’t beating myself up for becoming upset over the triggers, congratulating myself on this shining breakthrough.
✨I decided I was proud of my traits and next time, I’ll be more able to make light of a situation and perhaps again laugh at them too.
✨A serendipitous conversation with a friend eventuated very recently. It provided the  opportunity to search for photo of myself when I was a little girl.

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The mere sight of this innocent little thing with her life ahead of her.. tears effortlessly rolled down my cheeks while I was looking at the image of myself… I imagined wrapping my arms around her saying ‘I love you, gorgeous girl. You are precious.’ I told her she was beautiful, had a kind heart, just wanted to be understood and I reassured her that I understood her and had done so all her life…’but those pesky outside opinions and hand-me-down beliefs somehow had you all confused and unsure of who you were or had to be’.

Last week, I remembered this little girl…
…and just nurtured her back to love, by love. ‘It’s safe now to show your hyper sensitivity, it’s safe now to say you’re a dreamer, it’s safe now to show that child-like sparkly excitement over things that you are passionate about…’

I found this a very powerful part of my journey to acceptance…and now, the more layers I peel back, the more I’m realising I haven’t changed that much at all. What was required of me was to find those things that mattered to that little girl and let them shine, let them be used as a force for good for others. And to be proud of who she has become.

“I am worthy of love and acceptance as I am.”

It’s said that the path to self-forgiveness and acceptance is releasing shame and guilt. I realised this piece is really about these, so it’s with my pleasure that I offer this as part of Debbie’s ForgivingFridays

May you also feel you can love that little person in you…
Tell yourself the words you wished you could have heard back then, especially if you are finding parts of yourself difficult to accept or if certain things repeatedly push your buttons.

I wish you well in your journey, and please remember, we are all in this together. As always, you are very welcome to contribute anything here that has perhaps been on your mind.

Thank you for reading,
much love from Di ❀️

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39 thoughts on “Releasing the little person within.

  1. Di, I am kind of at a loss for words. This post is brilliant, honest and so damn profound. For whatever was said to you that pushed your button, I am so sorry, but for the perspective the experience provided to you, I am so thankful. You have a blessed mind and soul, and your ability to process hurt and turn it into something positive is astonishing. And what a pleasure it is to see a glimpse of you from your past. You were a little girl with a big heart, who years later, indeed found a way to shine. And your light is shining very bright, and providing hope to those who can’t seem to find their way through the darkness. I hope you are as proud of yourself, as I am to know you. Simply wonderful, Di. All of it. Thank you for continually being awesome! πŸ’•

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  2. What a beautifully open, honest and vulnerable post. And good lessons too. Thank you Di. I’m learning to be gentler with my little people too. πŸ™‚ I like Matt Kahn’s idea to speak to ourselves and others with the kindness we would offer a vulnerable 5-year-old. hugs and blessings, Brad

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello Brad,
      I’m absolutely touched by your visit here. Thank you so much and for your kind words about my post and sharing your thoughts.
      Yes, sit with that dear little 5 year old you… I know he had a kind heart…
      Glad you enjoyed Matt’s words. He is amazing. I’ll share his link in a post one day soon.
      Hugs and blessings to you too Brad and thank you again πŸ’πŸŒŸ

      Liked by 1 person

  3. I love this post, I found it through Debbie’s Forgiving Fridays. The metaphor of that leaf that’s reluctant to fall off that tree, for fear of that transformation, especially hit home. There is a lot of resistance on the path of releasing old patterns and beliefs that do not serve us anymore, I feel. At least that’s true for me. It reminds me of that wave that, when seeing the ocean’s shore and other waves crushing into it, is fearfully exclaiming: ‘OMG, I am going to die, I’m going to die’. Funny when you look at it like that. Not so funny when you are inside that wave’s skin. πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello to you (another from AustraliaπŸ™‚)
      I’m touched and humbled by your beautiful contribution here, and your kind words. They mean a lot to a relatively newie to blogging.
      To think something resonated with you here is my hope for any post I write. As you said in your ‘About’, we are all attempting to make sense of life together as we go along.
      I love your wave analogy too… I’d never heard about it before. It’s such a good one.
      I also love Tiny Buddha and must catch up on their site more often.
      Anyway, I’ll let you go! Thank you so much for reading and visiting πŸ’πŸŒŸ

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you so much. You will be very welcome whenever you pop by.
        Yes, so far I’m absolutely loving it. Thank you for your encouragement by visiting and adding your lovely thoughts πŸ’πŸ’•

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  4. What a beautiful, deeply profound and contemplative post dear Di. It’s so true that we often forget the child that lies within, the dreams, fears and hopes that we once held so close but when we search we can often find we really are still the same. Life experiences change us but every now and then (as you’ve done) it’s good to scrape back the layers and just accept ourselves as we are, beautiful and living our life the best we can. Lovely post as usual. Thanks for sharing your heart and journey with us. πŸ’•

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello lovely Miriam,
      Thank you so much for reading and for contributing your wonderful thoughts. Yes, it was something that came serendipitously recently and I gained a lot from it. So I had to share.
      Yes, I agree we are still the same but have attempted to cover it up under all the mixed messages along the way…
      Free to just be us. So powerful.
      Thank you for your kind compliment too. I’m very touched.
      Hugs to you my dear πŸ’πŸ’•

      Liked by 1 person

      1. And big hugs back to you Di, it really was a very meaningful piece of writing (as al of your posts are). πŸ’• Hope you have a lovely weekend. xo 🌹

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      2. Thank you so much sweet Miriam. And may I return the kind words back to you and your posts tooπŸ’
        Yes, it’s going to be perfect weather for some fun outdoor activities. I trust you will be out enjoying it too πŸ’œπŸ’œπŸ¦‹

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Di, I don’t know where to start. This is so lovely as always. You are such a beautiful, kind and inspiring woman. life is truly a journey isn’t it. Do you think a lot of your recent questioning is due to the timing of your life? The kids out of the house and moving to the next stage? I feel that life is always testing us. I too have had so many ups and downs yet now after so many years and years of searching I feel I have finally figured out who I clearly am and what I want and need. I regret not knowing it sooner as my 20s felt turbulent and my 30s so busy with the kids and now at 45 I keep thinking wow I better get going yet the kids are still 10 and 12. It is such a journey. Thanks for being so incredibly open and honest. I hope your children and Hubbie have read your beautiful words.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hello wonderful Nicole🌸
      I’m not sure where to start either…thank you so much, would be a great first thing to say.
      Yes, the timing could be part of it. Another part of it is knowing what was at my core and working out how best to contribute on what platform. I just knew private clinic in any of the multitude of hands on healing just weren’t calling to me. I think that’s why I’ve done so many. You will be happy to know I have found it in writing and blogging about it. It’s through meeting beautiful people such as yourself who have been the catalyst, vision and encouragement I needed. I have dreams with it all. And watching you do your social justice on your blog, I knew mine needed to add value. Who knows, I may be going to meet lovely Nat myself one day too. You are most certainly where you are meant to be… it shows in everything you do.
      I’m so happy for you and in your way, you are a change leader. What a wonderful way to live.
      My hubby reads it and thinks it’s totally ‘me’. My children and I rarely talk about it.
      Thank you for being such a constant support my dear friend. It means more than you could know πŸ™πŸΌπŸ’•πŸ’

      Liked by 2 people

  6. I think it’s true that you cannot grow without discomfort. Although we would all prefer to have an easy life with everything being the way we wish, the awakenings and realisations thrust upon us by discomfort enrich our lives in many ways. It always makes me emotional to think of my younger self and in counselling I found it very hard to even approach the little girl that was me. I felt a coldness towards her, perhaps because I felt she showed weakness or because I didn’t like those sensitive traits that made her fearful of (seemingly) everything. I have warmed somewhat and accepted those traits but, like you’ve discovered, those red buttons are still sensitive to the touch. I’m continually amazed by your perception and depth of thought, Di. I hope soon to get my fuzzy brain clear enough to work more thoroughly on my own perceptions. Thank you again for your vulnerability and sharing. πŸ’œπŸ’œ

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Hello dear Kim,
      Firstly, thank you for your honest contribution to this conversation. I appreciate and understand all you shared. The part that made me sad was that you felt a coldness to that little girl… there is a beautiful opportunity to spend some quiet time with her to let her know what you think now. She is just waiting to hear you love her as she is… it’s very powerful and a beautiful thing to do. I wish you well in reconnecting with her πŸ’œ
      Thank you too for your kind words about my perceptions…. they mean a lot. I guess all this introversion and time I love spending alone has some good things about them for sure.
      Hope your ‘fuzzy brain’ disappears soon.
      Take care and in gratitude,
      Di πŸ™‹πŸ»πŸ¦‹

      Liked by 1 person

  7. I was reading your post and thinking this is so wonderful I wonder if Di knows Debbie and her forgiving journal …I know for myself that showing my vulnerability took a long time but I now feel it is my strength. I love the photograph of you as a child. I am looking forward to reading your next post. 😍

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello dear Brigid,
      Thank you so much for your kind support and words.
      Actually, after reading your history to date, it gave me more confidence to go ahead with this post. I really wanted to share this one. So thank you for sharing your vulnerability too Brigid. And yes, I totally agree with you that’s it’s a strength.
      Thank you again πŸ’πŸŒŸπŸŒŸ

      Liked by 1 person

  8. You have offered yourself on the experiment board for us. Your journey Your experiences Your hard-hitting realities Your overcomes.
    All this courage in itself is an epitome of acceptance and an deep sense of well beingness for everyone.
    I loved how you have accepted miseries as an leverage to uplift you, indeed its very true. We should thank our discomforts to make our lives meaningful.
    I admired this line of wisdom and would love to hold on this as much β€œIt’s said that the path to self-forgiveness and acceptance is releasing shame and guilt”.

    Somewhere I sense,
    β€œI” and my body is different β€œI” hold equally responsible for ‘me’ as β€œI” hold for my family and friends.
    There may be no good or bad things but only experiences. As what is good may be bad and vice-versa.
    Detaching β€œI” is helpful to accept and attaching β€œI” is helpful to experience.

    Today’s post has again ignited the spirit of acceptance and courage. I need to work on this more ..
    Thanks for putting this up. The Kid has a beautiful eye and a wonderful heart.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hello dear ArtOfMobile,
      Thank you again for being free and comfortable to express yourself here.
      I value and appreciate all your comments and kind words on my post and photo.
      I’m touched that perhaps I have ignited something for you that may bring you greater peace and acceptance to you.
      You are very wise about things only being as they are… neither good not bad.
      Here is a piece from Shakespeare’s Hamlet…

      HAMLET. Why, then, ’tis none to you, for there is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so. To me it is a prison. HAMLET. Well, then it isn’t one to you, since nothing is really good or bad in itselfβ€”it’s all what a person thinks about it.”

      Thank you again dear friend for a very welcome contribution here πŸ™πŸΌπŸ’•

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      1. Dear Di,
        “but thinking makes it so.”…so precise. Lovely.
        Thanks for sharing. You know what I like :).
        The the enrichment I receive day by day , week by week from “YOU” is unfathomable!!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Honestly, you ALWAYS give me a reason to smile. I am humbled by your kindness, my very loyal friend. I can’t thank you enough πŸ™πŸΌπŸ’•

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      1. Thank you Kate. That means such a lot to me.
        Well, that is certainly my hope. I believe vulnerability is very connecting and healing.
        So glad to have you here πŸ’πŸŒŸ

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Well, it was Brene Brown who put it ‘on the map’ for me. I learnt that I appreciated it and so i now enjoy passing it on if it fits. Feel free to add a comment to see how it feels for you. Or not.
        You are welcome any time Kate πŸ’πŸ’•

        Liked by 1 person

  9. OMG, Di. I am so touched by your post. There is SO MUCH wisdom here, and strength of heart. Thank you, thank you for contributing this sharing to Forgiving Fridays. I’ll include it in my update on Friday.

    Your awarenesses are profound, and the loving and acceptance that you bring to yourself, and to your little girl inside is truly inspirational. My spiritual mentor John-Roger has said that whenever we think we’re done, there’s etcetera! πŸ™‚ Somehow I found that relieving.

    You on such a gorgeous path of spiritual awakening, and I am so inspired to know you and to receive the many gifts you share in your blog.
    I love you, Di! Blessings to you and to everyone who reads this post — Debbie

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Hello dear Debbie,
      I’m honoured and touched by your very generous comments. I’m glad you think it will be suitable after I tagged you.
      Thank you so much and yes, I love the quote from John-Roger… very true. It’s a journey for sure.
      Thank you again sweet lady. In gratitude, sending love to you too πŸ’πŸ’•

      Liked by 1 person

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